Dogs and Cats

[Vicki]

Subject: Dogs and Cats


 EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY
 
 Day number 180
 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
 1:00 PM - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
 4:00 PM - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
 5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
 
 Day number 181
 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
 11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
 1:00 PM - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
 4:00 PM - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
 5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
 
 Day number 182
 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
 9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
 9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
 10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
 11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
 12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
 1:00 PM - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
 1:30 PM - ooooooo. bath. bummer.
 4:00 PM - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
 5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
 5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
 
 EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY
 
 DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre
 
little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh
meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only  thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional
piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
 
DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by
weaving   around their feet while they were walking almost  succeeded, must try this at the   top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.
 
DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the
headless  body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.
 
 DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are.
For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture.
This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a
liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.
 
 DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their
event.  I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer.." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
 
 DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are
flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am
certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
 

[Ann]

It sums up the difference between them so neatly!

When dogs are so easy to please and cats are so pernickety about everything, it does make you wonder what it says about people like us who choose to live with cats rather than dogs though! Are we a bunch of masochists?

Ann

[Maria]

If you have a dog, you own it. If you have a cat, it owns you.
A dog will be eager to please you. You have to work hard at pleasing a cat.
Dogs are trained by their owners. People are trained by their cats.

Maria

[Xinzerella]

<<When dogs are so easy to please and cats are so pernickety about everything, it does make you wonder what it says about people like us who choose to live with cats rather than dogs though! Are we a bunch of masochists? >>

I would say that if you tie yourself to walking a dog every night, and letting it out every so often to go to the bathroom, and getting up early in case it wees in the kitchen - that's masochism  

[Ann]

There again, Dracs has been having trouble with furballs recently. Having been sick twice during the night, I was in the middle of a phone call earlier today, when he was sick again on the living room carpet, then had diarrhoea on the carpet. The phone call came to an abrupt conclusion!

Ann